Saturday, May 7, 2011

Beverly Hillbilly

I witnessed THE STRANGEST event while at work the other day. OK so it's been over a week since it happened, but I'm just now writing about it. It was the end of a long day, and I was working with a patient in a treatment room. The patient was face down on a massage table, nearly asleep, and I was working on his back. I was exhausted and kind of zoning out. I was gazing out the window, people watching, and counting down the minutes until I could be on my way home.

A woman squatting in front of her car on the side of the street caught my eye. I thought, "What? Is she peeing? Out in the open on a busy street in Beverly Hills? Next to Neiman Marcus!?" Yes my friends, she was. And this was no homeless-looking person either. She was nicely dressed, as if she had just gotten off of work. She then pulled up her pants, zipped them, and walked around to the side of her car. She stood there for a minute, swaying around a bit, and then put her hands on her head. So then I thought to myself, "OK, she must be drunk, or high on something." She was absolutely wasted. Her head then dropped forward, as if she was trying to touch her toes. She hung there for quite a while. She rolled up from her bent over position and shook her legs. I couldn't believe it. She had just peed again! Down the legs of her nice black work pants. That assumption was confirmed when she opened the door of her car and sat down on the passenger seat, leaving two puddles of urine on the sidewalk. At this point I felt sick to my stomach. It not only grossed me out but I was concerned! I almost felt like I should have done something. However, with a patient's care in my hands, I just continued to work and kept one eye glancing out the window.

After what seemed to be an attempt at a nap, she sat up from her slumped position and checked her hair and make up in the visor mirror. She grabbed something like a towel or t-shirt and patted at her wet pant legs. After thinking that she pulled herself together she got up, slung her purse over her shoulder, locked the car, and walked down the block. I don't know why it weirded me out so much. Unfortunately, drunk young people do things like that all the time. But not at of front of a physical therapy clinic. Or maybe they do, this is So Cal after all.

P.S. The patient I was working on had no idea that any of this was going on and he still received excellent patient care. Not to worry you.


  1. BLAAAAHHHH that is is so disgusting. I saw a guy freaking out in a car once in a safeway parking lot in broad daylight once. Like FREAKING out, on drugs, spaz attack. Somehow it's way way more disturbing when it's in an environment where you're not expecting it.

  2. LOL!!! okay, i'm sorry but for some reason this struck me as really pretty funny (or maybe humour's just my way of masking a lot of other emotions) don't know how you managed to keep a straight face on but if i were in your position i would've most likely be cracking up and going "ohmygod" the whole time. random crazy acts that people do sometimes just make me wonder what's going through their heads before, during and after. i've been seeing a lotta strange human behaviours, too. wonder if it's a sign or something... lol.

    at any rate, thanks for sharing this story. it had me laughing out loud and going "ewwww" at the same time but laughing! lol. keep writing (:

  3. thanks! I'm glad it amused you.